Wednesday, April 29, 2015

The Truth.

Dearest Anderson,

The truth is, at first I was scared. You were not "planned" by us.  Of course we wanted you, but to be honest, not quite as soon as you happened! It was the week of your brother's first birthday. It was the day we found out we had roughly 2 months to figure out "what was next"! Job? Housing? Where in the country we may live? Lots of things were changing & little did I know you were changing & growing inside of me! 

After an afternoon chat with your Auntie Whitney... she pointed out that I had complained of heartburn. (Something I only have while pregnant, thank God!!!). She asked if I could be pregnant! I said, "nahhhh! I really don't think so...." & then she convinced me to make sure. To my shock & immediate terror, I learned of your exsistance. I wasn't scared of YOU, I was scared of all the big changes headed our way. I'll admit, I was scared of how you'd change our sweet little family of 3. I was scared about how 1 more would change our financial situation. I was scared how our families would react to a "surprise" pregnancy. I was just scared. 

Well, we took the opportunity to share this exciting news with all of your family after your big brother's 1st birthday party! Everyone was SO thrilled!!! Shocked, but thrilled. 

As the days passed the stresses of our changing circumstances grew. Your Daddy went to work & Mommy applied for jobs all over the country for him. We heard nothing back. We apartment shopped, hoping we could stay where we were... but there was no way we could stay unless Daddy got a new job... which we tried too. No doors seemed to open & you grew & Mommy got sick (a lot, but it's ok!). We decided to step out in faith & move to Tallahassee for a potential job. We'd be close to Gramma & Papa, we could find affordable housing & hopefully he'd get the job. You grew perfectly which was such a blessing since so much was going on here on the outside!

We moved & big brother loves it here... we sure hope you do too! It's great living near Gramma & Papa... plus, we're 7 hours closer to Grandee Carol!! Daddy got a job & we love the church that we get to be a part of, everyone is really excited to meet you there! We bought a house, it's where you'll grow up! 

Our hearts are so full & our eyes tear up thinking about the last 9 months. You were not expected by us, but God was not surprised. He made you perfectly. He has knitted you together in my womb. Your presence pushed us to make some big decisions, ones we're forever grateful for. You are so loved, dear son. Please come out so we can all meet you! We're ready to be a family of 4. 

Love, Mommy

1 comment:

  1. Love this! Praying for you & your family as you deliver soon. Your heart only grows w/ each child.