Tomorrow marks 5 months of my breastfeeding journey. I consider myself NO expert on the matter! However, I just want to say... it's hard work!
It's stressful. There is the stress of if you're producing enough. There is the stress of trying to stop stressing! It hurts. It doesn't always come naturally. It's new for baby & for mommy.
For me there wasn't an immediate bond formed by breastfeeding. I mean, no more than the very first moment I laid my eyes on him and fell madly in love!
I say all that to say this; I'm glad I was able to breastfeed. It's hard work & it hurts at first, but it's how God designed our bodies to function. There are sweet moments where I really enjoy it. Those middle of the night feedings when you have a sweet sleepy baby who is extra cuddly after the feeding... they rank high on my favorite things list!
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| Photo by Sarah Gray Photography |
I don't think you could have prepared me enough for how my breastfeeding experience would go. It's kind of one of those things I had to do... in order to understand. First off, we couldn't get the latch down. There were many hormonal and exhausted tears. Few things are worse than when you can't feed your baby or meet their needs! My life was changed when my lactation consultant introduced me to the nipple shield! Life. Changing. Without it, I certainly would have given up all together! I will never forget the moment Raleigh finally latched on! His body was convulsing as he was swallowing and sucking so hard! It was incredible to watch this tiny little person learn how to eat and use every fiber of his being to do it. Incredible.
I do however wish someone would have told me that nursing would become my full time job! If a newborn is supposed to eat 10-12 times a day... & most feedings last 30-45 minutes... well you do the math! That's a legit work day. I felt like a had no time to do anything else!! {honestly I didn't!} BUT take heart new mommies... baby will get faster & you will adjust.
Now, breastfeeding has kind of had a resurgence in America. It's great! I know that my breast milk has tons of awesome properties and nutrition made especially for my baby! I'm so thankful my body was able to produce enough to feed my baby. But along with this resurgence of "breast is best" and what not... there has become this stigma with formula. Can I just say... there is NOTHING wrong with feeding your baby! Isn't that the most important thing!? I know so many women who have to supplement with formula or choose to do formula for every feeding, it is not shameful! I applaud any mother who feeds her baby. It's cruel to make a new, exhausted, hormonal mother feel inadequate! *Ok rant over*
I suppose the point of me writing this is to say... breastfeeding is challenging, but worth it. I have remind myself that this is such a short time in my life. When I start to complain about not having anything "nursing friendly" to wear, realizing I need to pump in order to leave my baby in the nursery or just feeling "inconvenienced" altogether... I realize it's not about me anymore & that I should be thankful for this opportunity! Yep, welcome to motherhood. It's harder than I ever thought & more amazing than I could have ever imagined.
Thank you for your sensitivity to those of us who were not able to take this same journey. For me, my body just could not keep up with the demands and was doing good just to keep me alive....forget doing anything "extra". I definitely felt the shame and guilt that comes along with having a "formula baby", but I finally realized it was out of my control. She is happy and healthy and smart and I have finally quit worrying about something that seems so trivial now. I commend you and all of the other Mamas out there who devote your entire life (literally!) to providing for your baby in this way. That must be an incredible feeling of accomplishment and you SHOULD be proud!! Keep up the good work! =)
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful picture-- love it. I was kind of weirded out by my future breastfeeding, when I was pregnant, and when I first got to hold my baby in the nicu and saw she was hungry, it just felt so natural. It was definitely hard at first, and I did have to supplement with some formula at first, but now I love it and it's become such a great bonding experience. I had initially planned to BF for six months, but once everything started going smoothly, I just figured I'd keep going until whenever.
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